Dear Mr. Winter…

Good morning! I see you’re up and at ‘em early today. Looks really chilly outside…just as you like it. And what’s this? Snow in the forecast? Oh, you are a giver.

So I’ve been noticing that you’re putting in quite a bit of overtime lately. Talk about dedication! No one can accuse you of being a slacker this season, right? All those comments we made around here last year about it being a mild winter—guess you showed us! Good for you. Good for you.

I don’t know how anyone ever gave you the nickname “Old Man Winter.” There is nothing old about you. You are obviously quite vigorous, vital, and fit. Kudos to your workout regime. Do you belong to a gym? Have a personal trainer?

Anyhow, I was just thinking that even the Chuck Norris of seasons needs a break every now and then. You know, a little time to relax, to just chill out. HAH! Chill out. You’d be great at that, Winter. May I call you Winter?

Truly though, if you have any thoughts about calling it a season and heading off to vacay, say maybe at the North Pole or somewhere fun like that, I just want you to know that we’re all behind you. I think I speak for just about all of frozen humanity when I say that we wish you well. You’ve done so much to us…I mean for us…already, what with all the effort behind the ice storms, the snow, the crazy low temperatures. Take one, two, or say nine months, and just go be your frosty self.

Relax. Enjoy life! Sit on an iceberg. Sip on a frozen margarita. Get to know some polar bears. Actually, they’d love to see you. You could beef up some of that frozen tundra for them. You could single-handedly put an end to any concerns about global warming. A philanthropic vacation! It’s so like you.

You’ve earned a little “me” time, Winter. You give and give and I’m wildly, completely sure you feel under-appreciated. So very sure.

So go. Just go. Let Spring step up. Oh, sure, she’ll eventually need help from Summer, but let them worry about that. We’ll try to get by without you. We’ll be OK. Really. Please. Go.

Much love and total respect,

PS: Send a postcard!

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